Top 10 requirements for the perfect next-gen game

If there’s anything we’ve learned from the first year of the PlayStation 4 and Xbox One, it’s that this new generation of games should have certain features. It’s not ‘Next-gen’ unless you have certain things in your game, right? So for all you developers who are considering making a game, here are the Top 10 things you need to make the perfect next-gen game.

And if we're honest with ourselves, this is what gamers want, right?

10 E3 presentation showing amazing graphics that’ll look nothing like the finished product

Listen, I love E3. I love the experience and the spectacle, but I completely realize that the entire show is PR maneuvering. Since I’ve been attending E3, I have become accustom to E3 presentation that show amazing visuals — the most impressive graphics we have seen in gaming yet. Are they ever that when the game releases? No. So remember to build up expectation and hype with visuals and cinematics that will probably be 900p and 30fps at release.

9 Open-world filled with side quests

Open-world all the games! Racing games! RPGs! First-person shooters! They all need open worlds where you can go anywhere and complete hundreds of side quests. This way, when the game has a ton of bugs of graphical hiccups, you have the excuse ‘it’s because of the size of the world.’ Open-world is a great gimmick; whether your game needs it or not, gamers love to hear that something is open-world.

8 Some sort of console exclusivity

Listen, if you’re going to make a next-gen game, tie that sh*t to some console exclusivity. Everyone’s doing it. If it’s not going to be on just one of the consoles, then at least have the DLC have timed exclusivity for a certain console. Or maybe offer certain features as exclusive features for certain consoles.

7 Microtransactions

Your game needs microtransactions. Gamers love nothing more than spending a few bucks here and there for costume items or packs to get you items in multiplayer. And if you don’t feel comfortable with the term ‘microtransactions’, just release DLC that locks players out of normal content unless they buy the DLC.

6 Option for female characters, unless development costs too much

We want equality in gaming. If a game has a male protagonist, there should be an option for a female protagonist as well. This is 2014… weeks away from 2015. The option to play as a female should be mandatory by now. Unless development for female animations cost too much. That’s a totally legit excuse that we will accept.

5 Multiplayer that doesn’t work because of server issues

Multiplayer is a must in any new game release. Co-op, PvP — it doesn’t matter. Just make sure you have multiplayer in your game at launch. Even more important is to make sure that no one can play the multiplayer because of matchmaking issues or server problems. We love to be teased by a feature that won’t let us connect and play it for a good week or so. If you want to take it one step further, have the game be online only, and then have server issues!

4 Bullshots, bullshots, bullshots

Throughout the entire development process, whenever you send out images of your game, make sure they are bullshots. We don’t want normal screenshots of the gameplay. We want screenshots that are made up to look 20x better than what the game really looks like. We won’t accept anything less.

3 An HD remake of a previous console generation game

Is your new game an HD remake of a game that appeared on a previous console generation? No? Then GTFO.

2 Indie or AAA — no inbetween

If you’re going to develop a game, you better be a two-to-four person indie team, or you better be a AAA developer with a $200 million+ budget. There’s no inbetween. We only accept those two. Also, only 16-bit graphics or hyper-realistic visuals will be considered.

1 MMO

Your game doesn’t have to be an MMO, but it sure as hell better have MMO elements to it. You can even tell us it is an MMO, only to backtrack on those statements later and add clarification. We don’t care. Take our $60 for a game with MMO elements that doesn’t have matchmaking, voice chat or many other things that make an MMO what it is.